Monday, April 16, 2012

The First Day of the Weak

photo

Mondays tend to hit me like a freight train.  All of a sudden my alarm's going off and the weekend is abruptly over.  I usually struggle to stay awake as long as I can on Sunday night to try and absorb as many of those last few minutes with James as possible, but inevitably I fall asleep at pretty much the same time as always and then, all of a sudden, it's time to get my shit together and begin the week.

It seems to me that the start of each new week would get easier, that our opposing schedules would become commonplace and not quite so jarring.  Yet each and every Monday I struggle to stay optimistic, clinging desperately to my rational side while fighting the whirlpool of existential crises that Mondays always seem to conjure up.  "What are we doing all this for?", "Is anything ever going to change?", "Am I really just living for those two days out of seven?"

Mondays are generally about swatting those detrimental thoughts away like mid-summer mosquitoes, lest they bite you and leave you in an annoying funk for the rest of the week.  Yet it gets harder and harder to stay optimistic (but I should note that I'm pretty miserable at optimism in general).

I know I have a lot of really wonderful things going on in my life and that I'm lucky in so many ways, but we all know blogland get's a little sunshiney and rainbowy and unicorny and I think sometimes that can make us bloggers/readers-of-blogs feel alone in our mundane struggles.  Whether it be that we don't have the perfect outfit on 24/7 or our houses don't scream 'Eat your heart out, HGTV!', or our relationships aren't endless streams of 'I looove yous'.  So I'm going to be real with you: seeing James for basically 24 combined hours each week sucks.

I'm just putting it out there.  I don't like it and I'm fully aware that there's nothing I can do about it.  I have to wait it out.  I have to hope someday they'll switch him to the day shift.  I have to put on my big girl pants and not throw a hissy fit every Monday. 

Things that don't suck:

-Last night's Mad Men.  Even if you don't watch it, here's a quote from the Huffington Post review of the episode that put a pretty big smile on my face: "...Don showed him up at home with the sexiest kitchen repair in American history."  Yes he did...

-This photo.  Thank you, Clintons for being so prominently endearing in pop culture in the past week or so.  I surely hope that photo sparks a new meme.

-My job.  Seriously, my job does not suck.  It’s actually ridiculously fantastic.

-I just realized my grandmother sent me kettle corn as opposed to regular popcorn and you can bet your ass I'll be imbibing in some tonight.  Mmmmm, kettle corn!

I don’t know yet if this will fall under the ‘sucks’ or ‘doesn’t suck’ list, but I’m going to go check out the premiere of Girls now.

1 comment:

  1. i feel ya on questioning the general direction of life, will things last forever, am i doing what i want. but i think if you're not asking those questions you're just kind of floating along. it's good to check in with yourself. some days you'll like what you have. some days you won't. figure out what to keep doing and what to not keep doing. and for your sake i hope james gets switched. i'm in a long distance relationship and i look forward to when it's a near distance relationship. it's nice to see the one you love!

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