There are those days which seem so interminably dreary that you can think of nothing better to do than just curling up into a ball and sleeping until the doldrums disappear (cough, this post, cough). However, I urge you to fear not, for I have done extensive research in this field of listlessness and have developed a formula for snapping out of these funks we all get into from time to time.
“Pour yourself a drink, put on some lipstick and pull yourself together” –via Elizabeth Taylor
I affectionately refer to it as Lipstick Hero. (And I sing to myself a song that sounds a lot like Jukebox Hero… by Foreigner… classic song…. if I need to describe Jukebox Hero to you more, then you need to leave this page immediately and Google it you living under a rock creature, you.) Also, if you are a male, listening to Foreigner might be the only thing that applies to you in this post. Might being the operative word.
Look into my eyes. You can trust me.
Find an obnoxiously bright colored lipstick that you impulsively bought, but never actually got around to wearing. They say that in a bad economy sales of lipstick actually rise because it’s a tiny little indulgence that makes you feel better. I say, the same principle applies when you’re in a funk.
[Note: what is obnoxiously bright to one person may be downright neutral to another… relativity people.]
Apply said lipstick.
Throw caution and your self-consciousness to the wind. You’re in a funk after all, so what do you care? [Hint: nobody ever really judges you for wearing lipstick, that’s all in your head.]
Get thee on Pandora and don’t even think about going to Jeff Buckley radio!
My suggestion? 90s Pop Radio. If the combination of Britney’s ‘Lucky’, Biggie’s ‘Hypnotize’, and Third Eye Blind’s ‘Semi-Charmed Life’ doesn’t pump a little life back into you than you might be terminal…
No I’m totally just kidding. You just need to try ‘Keep On Loving You’ Radio. And you need to sing.
At the top of your lungs.
Do the smallest chore on your list. (Don’t you dare turn off Pandora! I physically can’t do chores without music.)
Oftentimes these funks are caused by the pile-up of mindless tasks you need to do or the lack of purpose you feel in your day-to-day life. If I do just one small task, usually doing the dishes, I trick myself into being more productive. Just tell yourself you’re only going to do that one thing and then nothing else at all. I bet you’ll wind up doing more than you expected.
Not to mention, the more organized/clean your environment feels, the better you feel. Automatically.
[Examples: do the dishes, make your bed, vacuum, dust, clean a mirror, take out the trash, shower… literally any small thing!]
I’ve worked enough soul-sucking office jobs to know that if I’m not doing something creative in my downtime, I’m often quite listless day-to-day. Are you on Pinterest? You should be if you aren’t. Find some DIY crafts and set aside time to actually do them. There’s a reason little kids get to do so many of these in school, you get to use a different part of your brain and, regardless of how perfect the outcome is, you’re left with a sense of satisfaction and accomplishment in the end. Plus some cool, new thing you made!
Make a Sad Day folder. You should do this ahead of time and then go through it when you’re all down and out.
Mine’s on my computer, you could compile a real, live one too if you so desired. In this folder I save funny conversations I have over g-chat, pictures that make me laugh of either my friends or things I see online, quotes that I like, etc. Anything that makes you smile goes.
So there you have it, my scientific formula for feeling better. Sometimes I have to force myself to get going, but afterwards I always feel better. Seriously, always.
Was it entirely necessary for me to show you my progression of happiness? No… not at all.
If it’s still not working?
Put on another lipstick shade and sing along. Now. I’m not kidding.